3 PRO-TIPS Before You Start Planning Your Wedding!
Congratulations!!! You’re engaged to the love of your life! What a beautiful time for you and your family!
So when’s THE BIG DAY???
How many times have you been asked that question since your engagement? Have you started feeling the pressure of your wedding yet? Isn’t this time supposed to be a fun time in your life? So why do you feel so stressed? Is it because you don’t know where to begin?
Planning THE BIG DAY is NOT supposed to be stressful! It’s supposed to be a fun and adventurous journey to planning the most beautiful and emotional day of your life!
But seriously, there are plenty of things you can do to help eliminate the stress that is caused by planning a wedding. With over 15 years of Wedding Planning experience and hundreds of weddings under my belt, I have found these 3 pro-tips to help you plan THE BIG DAY, get organized, and start this wonderful, memorable, and exciting journey to planning your beautiful wedding.
PRO — TIP #1 — The Guest List
The Guest List is the first and most important step to start the planning process for your wedding. After all, it’s the event of the year, and who’s who will be there. You want to make sure that your wedding guests are people who are near and dear to you. These guests are going to be a part of your most special day, and you want the room to be filled with love, laughter, and happiness.
One of the most common assumptions that many couple’s make if they have a lot of out of town guests is:
“I’ll send them the invitation, they won’t come!” - WRONG!!!
Many people look for a reason to travel (not that you ever need a reason), but a wedding is the BEST reason to travel and join family and friends in the union of the couple to be wed. It’s such a happy time in your life, and most people want to be a part of this union and will take the extra steps to be witness to that. So if budget is an issue, or your venue is not large enough, please be mindful of how many out of town guests you invite. This is why making the guest list is so important before you book the venue.
Creating the guest list is fun and easy! Shrinking down the guest list is tedious and even painful at times. Here is my advice to help make this task a little bit easier.
Once you have the main guest list completed, from both sides, then break it down into 3 columns.
Column A: Must Invite List
This list is the list of all immediate family and friends who are near and dear, who play an active role in your life, and you have seen within the past year. Of course, there will always be exceptions to the rule of people who are near and dear to you that you can’t see as often as you like, but you love them and want them at your wedding. Those people belong on this list.
Column B: Would Love To Invite, and will make room.
This list if for extended family members, friends, colleagues, acquaintances, etc. that you keep in touch with regularly and see on occasion and would love to share your special day with them as they are loved and respected by you. Also, when you think about not sharing your day with them, it makes you a little sad.
Column C: Nice to have, if I have the space.
This list is for the people who you would like to have at your wedding because you respect them and truly enjoy their company, but they are far enough from your inner circle, that it will be just fine if they are not invited. No hard feelings.
So once you’re engaged, get to work on that guest list so that you have a general idea of the size of wedding you are looking to plan.
PRO - TIP #2
It’s all about the Benjamins! Oops, the BUDGET!
The Wedding Planning Process is a lot of fun! But, when it comes to money, sometimes, that takes away the fun. Budgeting is key to make sure you are being realistic in your wants and desires with what you can actually afford. We typically ask 3 key questions to start the budgeting process.
Budget Question #1 — Who’s paying for the wedding?
Are your parents paying for the wedding? Or are you footing the bill? If your parents are paying all or part of the bill, you want to sit down with them to understand what their expectations are, and what they envision for your wedding. I have witnessed it many times where parents have very specific requests that the couple is not happy with, but they have to oblige because they are paying for the wedding. This includes inviting their friends and adding to your guest list. So have this conversation with them asap, before you book anything.
If you are paying for the wedding, then it’s your call, however, I do encourage you to have a discussion with your parents and see if they would like to invite anyone near and dear to them that are not on your guest list. This is a sign of respect to your parents, and remember, this is a very proud moment for them and they want to show you off!
Budget Question #2 — Who’s making the decisions for the wedding?
If you are paying for the entire wedding and nobody is helping you with the bill, then you are the main and final decision maker.
If your parents are paying for the wedding, it is very important to sit down and discuss the extent in which your parents want to be involved in the decision making process. Some parents want to be the “Bank” and just write a check and pay for whatever you need. Other’s will give you a number, and let you make all the detailed decisions. And other’s will want detailed estimates for everything they will be paying for. So find out in advance, and make sure you, your partner, and your parents are all on the same page so there won’t be any unnecessary challenges during the event planning process.
Budget Question #3 — How much money is there to actually spend?
Whoever is paying for the wedding must come to terms with the amount of money they are willing to spend on the wedding. In addition to that number, add about 10% more because there are always unexpected wedding expenses.
Your dream wedding can cost you upwards of $300,000, but in reality, you might only have $75,000 to spend. So what do you do? BUDGET!!!!
This is where you must sit down with your partner and make a budgeting priority list and create an excel spreadsheet or use a budgeting app to keep track of all your deposits, due dates, and expenses.
What’s important to you?
Here are some items to prioritize on your list.
Venue Location
Ceremony Location
Food and Beverage
Flowers + Décor
Photo + Video
Music + Entertainment
Wedding Dress
Save the Date’s and Invitations
Hair + Makeup
Transportation
Pre-Wedding Parties + Celebrations
This list goes on and on and this is only the tip of the iceberg, but the most important elements of the wedding. Put these items in a priority list, and start with the most important element first. What are the top 3 priorities for you, your partner, your mom, dad, or whoever is footing some or all of the bill. Hopefully the priorities are the same, but if not, look back at that list and see what changes can be made to try to get on the same page. This will prevent future arguments over things that may not even matter to you.
Some Advice: Open a separate and joint bank account so that it will be easier to keep track of all the spending and to know if you are staying within budget.
PRO — TIP #3 — Should I Hire A Wedding Planner?
Short Answer. YES!!! (but I have a small bias, being a Wedding Planner!)
But seriously, hiring a Wedding Planner will save you tons of time, money, and stress during the wedding planning process. Think of us as professional 3rd wheels who are here to make your wedding planning journey fun, memorable, and exciting. When we succeed in bringing your vision to life, we all win. We’re your support, your cheerleading squad, your therapist, your gal pal, shopping buddy, style consultant, time-management guru, your drink partner, and your shoulder to cry on!
We’ve got your back, in more ways than one!
What does a Wedding Planner do anyway?
A lot! Let me start by saying, details…details….details….
As a guest to a wedding, most people don’t realize what it takes to make your guest experience magical. There is a lot of attention to detail and concern for the guest experience that is placed in the wedding planning process to make sure you have a wonderful and memorable time, tell your friends, and want to celebrate like that again! We care about your experience, and that’s why details…details…details….
I will discuss more about what Wedding Planner’s do on my next blog post, so stay tuned!
There are a few things to think about and ask yourself before you hire a Wedding Planner. Here are a few questions to ask yourself to make sure that hiring a Wedding Planner is right for you:
What type of wedding are you planning? Is it a destination wedding, large wedding (150+), an off site wedding where you are going to build out the entire reception with tents and rentals? Multiple locations? Deciding on this will help you determine how much help you need.
Do you have difficult family dynamics? The wedding planner will come as a neutral third party, negotiator, and mediator. Bonus, you can even vent to your planner and they won’t charge you extra for that!
How much time a week can you dedicate to planning your wedding? Do you have a difficult and inflexible work schedule? On average, can you dedicate 10–15 hours to planning your wedding a week in the first few months? Then 10–20 hours a week in the 2 months prior to your wedding? If your answer is no to this set of questions, then the Wedding Planner will be your lifesaver.
How organized are you? If organization is not your strong suit, then a Wedding Planner will be your saving grace, trust me!
Is there room in the budget for a Full Service Planner, Partial Service Planner, an Event Manager, or Month of Coordinator? Fees and services vary from one planner to another, due to level of experience, number of events already in their calendars, and the level of details that your wedding requires.
Hiring a Wedding Planner can be costly depending on what level of service you are looking to hire someone for. Here is a brief breakdown of the levels of service for Wedding Planner’s.
A Full Service Wedding Planner is someone who has extensive experience planning weddings, and helps the client from A to Z in the wedding planning process. All details are managed and booked through the wedding planner.
A Partial Service Wedding Planner is someone who has extensive experience in wedding planning, and will help the client with all the details of the wedding. The couple would have already chosen a location for the ceremony and reception.
A Wedding Management Service from a Wedding Planner is just that, managing the event. The couple would have done all the groundwork for the wedding and have booked 90% of vendors for the wedding day. The Wedding Planner then steps in about 3 to 4 months prior to the wedding, goes over all the details, manages the contracts, and finds areas of the wedding that need additional vendors, modified contracts, adjust timelines, and confirms everything for the day. Additionally they will create a wedding day timeline and vendor management schedule.
A Month of Coordinator is a service provided by Wedding Planners to help the client finalize the details a month before the wedding. The service provided by the planner is limited, and the main reason to have this planner on the month of is to make sure that wedding day goes smoothly.
The services that each planner provides is unique to them, their skillset, and experience with their past clients. Some planners will go the extra mile for the tiny details of the wedding, while other planners will only focus on the big picture moments of the day. It’s really important to interview the Wedding Planner as they will interview you to make sure that you are the right fit for one another. Your wedding planner is there for you to make this process stress free and fun. When you have a positive vibe with your planner, feel comfortable and welcomed by them, and most importantly can be honest with them, then you have found your perfect match!
Here’s to an exceptionally stress-free start to your wedding planning process! I hope this article has given you some nice information to start planning your dream wedding!